3 Too Many

“Science may have found a cure for most evils; but it has found no remedy for the worst of them all — the apathy of human beings.”  ― Helen Keller

Well with all the sleep from yesterday while I was meant tot be having dinner, etc, and being social I feel fairly well rested all round. Though I have been up since 5am (I think). Didn’t wake with night terrors or my bug buddies doing a countdown them jumping on me either. So all in all a good as close to restful sleep as I’ve had in a long time.  Sorry the blogs late again today but between work, seizures, fatigue, life, kids, the webmaster making changes to the blog hosting site (gggrrrr – don’t get me going on that one) things are a little busy this time of year. So to say the least that for me to waste your previous time even more with more dribble than usual would be an insult of sorts.

As I said up early to watch the end of days begin – did the Mayans really get it right or did they know that we had a cunning plan already that would supersede their one? Either way no prizes for knowing what happened – yep I got to have a second bowl of honey puffs while waiting – oh no sorry, wrong line -ahh the world didn’t end, so sorry folks bills still to be paid next due date – esp. The one on the rental of the Chinese life support capsule

What a beautiful morning. Not to hot, just awesome. If there is one benefit to these MoFo’s then I guess it is having this messed up sleep pattern means you get to see some awesome sun rises, perfectly still, picture perfect dawns, etc. The late spring air just perfumed enough to make it enjoyable. Good grief, I’m sounding very feminine! Login to work then spray the lawn as it is still as air wise. Boys sleep in a bit then drag their sorry little butts out of bed to. Get ready to faced the day. Working from home today to as have Nurse Maude paying a visit.

Quiet day but stay if that makes sense.  The boys get put to work as they always do this time of year, picking, weighting and selling Plums. Thanks Glenn for helping to organize the table and things. My head space wasn’t brilliant today. Craig drops Matt over to hang with the lads. They have a great time and there is not a single issue from anyone – mainly me. Love it when days just flow smoothly. Well so I thought. Had to crash out about 11 am as I was probably very close to collapsing, and that is not what the boys need!  Have a rest for about an hour and wake ready to take on the arvo. The lads talk me into letting them get fish and chips for lunch. Should make them pay from their earnings, but are kind and don’t (I wouldn’t anyway).

Quiet arvo too. The Doctor from Nurse Maude arrives to give me a check up following on from my Doctors appointment and the nurses appointments earlier this week. So now I have 2 GP Doctors, 2 District Nurses, a Professor,a Neurosurgeon and a Neurologist, and a Pharmacist – phew!! And I only started with a head ache B-) If anything from this whole messed up world of mine, it shows the NZ health system does work, does care, and yes I know I am one voice in masses, but I have not found s point to falter on really through out this all. Just always remember this – keep notes, lots of them, and a diary of all appointments, of you, of someone you are caring about, it makes everything so much easier, and my God send has been the fact that Sue being a Personal Assistant to Execs (previously) and needing incredible accuracy in her current role, means everything is ticked, checked, documented double checked and questioned without hesitation. Really, I think without her I’d be in a corner rocking and not getting to my appointments, etc.

The Doctor goes well, slight changes in medication dose levels up again as getting to much pain breaking through. And get a backup brew of my new magic drug ordered as well. It is fantastic stuff, in case I haven’t already told you. Good I feel at times so much more like my old self that it scares me. But it is great for those around me. I had a call yesterday from someone that I spoke to on Monday. They were that concerned about me and my mental and emotional state that they needed to check-in. Now the fact they were prepared to be that blunt about why they called me says a lot about them as a person and how they know me really as a person. But during talking to them what got me is that they said on Monday my voice told far more than I could ever cover. I’ve always prided myself on the fact that I can wear many masks depending on the situation, but it seems in this case that I could cover up. After talking a lot with people close to me about it, it seems that even by my stubborn status had let myself get that low, that quick. But I am now out of this stage and back to bear on my old self. Thanks for recognising and being so honest about your concerns for me. It helped me in so many more ways than a simple snap out of it attitude. If you ever do see, notice or some how recognised a person that seems to be not quiet themselves v ice it press. I know it is a risky call sometimes, but in my case it is they know me and my voice said volumes, and I feel very humbled by their actions.

Evening is a right off as fatigue and seizures having their way with me big time. What a way to waste time. I really mean that. Ok,I accept that i could in reality be having dramatic funky chicken hospital needed one’s, . But basically sleeping the whole evening away makes for a very lonely place for Sue.  Anyhow I have arrived here after blacking out for an hour – fantastic, I’ll count that as sleep. Trust all survived their Fridays we’ll and enjoyed missing the end of the world. Take care.

Kia Kaha.