3 Too Many

“Don’t knock on death’s door. Hit the doorbell and run.He hates that.” – unknown. 

Taking back pain pills (that make you sleepy) 3 hours before you’re due to get up, doesn’t do the old absence seizures effect much good.

In fact it knocked me down that flat for the morning at work that I may as well had a pillow and duvet and slept on the couches in the office. What a bloody struggle of a day to stay lively. Result of a sad crappy sleep. Went through the emotional wringer last night, had trouble breathing several times, wake up feeling like I’m drowning ads my chest feels too to tight. Why the emotional crap? Cause I’m bloody sick of surrendering more and more of my life to these tumours. Everyday I notice a little more of my independence gone, something that I could do yesterday is now a battle to do! Then my back adds its pain.

Wake about 6 am feeling exhausted and with my bloody head thumping- no surprises there. Head down to get some good pain killers. Then get ready for the day or is that do battle with the day, and everything in it. Walk into work. Stand in the lift wondering why it’s not going anywhere then realise that I haven’t swapped my access card – doh! Swap my card and get to my floor. Sit down- well flop downm more like, and honestly nearly collapse. Have a good morning and manage to last it through. Aladdin and Bernard help me out with spring my lunch – thanks guys.. glad I didn’t send food flying trying to eat as usual. Nice to have great friends and colleagues that will take care of you when you need a little help, or talk to you when you just need an ear to listen to you. Especially now that I have a growing need on others for assistance. I still Try to make light of things and hate asking for help, so I’ll say sorrynow if  I get snappy when /if you offer help. It is just frustration raring it’s ugly head, and as I’ve always been an independent sort of person, it makes the backlash worse sometimes I think. Sue picks me up about 1pm and we head home.I  Have a snooze in the sun  for about 4 – hours. Dad delivercalls to see how I am and how all are both myself and the family. Take the boys to footy practice then go round to fridge and Nutty’s for a coffee and chat. Back to collect the lads. Then home for dinner. And blog. Watch some tv and get through the blog. Have you had a good day? Hope so as you just never known what shit life is going to throw at you,and I think I’m proof enough of that statement. Take care. Make plans, have fun. And be good at it.  Happy Birthday Craig!! Cheers,  hope you’re having a couple of quiets and your ladies have spoilt you today.

Kia Kaha.