Tuesday 4 September Ramble
September 4, 2012 — Headless“After all of this is over, all that will really matter is how we treated each other.” – Unknown
Usual broken sleep night. Wake properly about 6 and do the usual staring at the ceiling until it is time to get up, but can’t be bothered as feel sore. Drag myself up finally and get ready for work. Not in the eating or drinking mood as nausea is doing its thing. So skip breakfast and my cup of tea. Head into the office.
Nice to see everyone. Go through setting up the new Google Apps and Mail stuff. Slow going as head is very sore and body aching therefore making it hard to read or concentrate properly. Probably best I am around others today as not feeling the best.
I have noticed that I’m now having more problems with my short-term memory. In that I can wander around the house trying to remember what I was going to do sometimes. This really annoys me as I used to have an excellent memory, both long and short-term. Yet another change brought about by the 3 mofo’s. Not in for a good day all up really. Emotionally screwed today, to put it bluntly. I have several random teary moments. If I only knew why, but just feeling very sad about life in general. The mind keeps wandering to places that aren’t good as well. Head is giving me hell to pain wise as I just can’t shake the pain either. The drugs aren’t doing their thing very well 
And the body is aching all over too, but mainly the joints and back. Something new to discuss with the Chemo Doctor on Monday.
Sue picks me up about 1pm, and we head to see Nevil. Great news is that he is getting discharged from hospital today. Fantastic news. I fall asleep in the sun for most of the visit – sorry about that. Just fatigue doing it’s thing. Then head for home. Nearly fall asleep again in the sun – bugger, seem to be having a sleeping day again. Go to the chemist then and get some Ensure drink that has been recommended to me (thanks Sarah) as I haven’t been able to eat anything substantial for about a week or more. This is why I am probably feeling so crappy. But it is hard to eat when it is a struggle to even drink water. I take one of my strong pre-chemo anti-nausea tablets to see if that helps, and it seems to be enough that I can eat dinner – yay, food!!! All be it a small amount, but at least it is something. The only down side is i only have a limited number of the drugs and there is a shortage in NZ of them, so don’t want to use them all in case I can’t get more before the next round of Chemo next week.
Get on with blogging it, though hard work with head hurting and all over the place. Going to head to bed soon to read and hopefully have th electric blanket sooth some of the body aches. Trust all have had or are having a good day/arvo/evening. Till the morrow.
Kia Kaha.
September 5, 2012 at 12:04 am
Hey Tony – I’m sad to read your having a really hard time with pain, aches and general uncomfortable restlessness! It’s not much fun at all! Definately speak to your Dr about this – you shouldn’t have to be in this much pain, especially this day and age!!! Like you, my pain relief doesn’t take away my pain, it just drops it to a dull constant ache, on a good day! It very frustrating! I constantly wonder, on the bad pain days, how they will control my pain when this cancer starts growing again…… I’m on the strongest now!!! It’s a scary thought,yet I can’t not think about that! Do you ever think like that?
Good luck with Ensure, as I told Sue – it can be pretty disgusting, but mixed with milk and blend the crap out of it, it can be tolerated more like a smoothie like that! But – it’s really great if your not eating/drinking much – should help with energy and make your body feel better! (it’s also cheaper to get a prescription for Ensure through your GP – much cheaper than just going in, and you get a shit load of them via prescription!)!!
Is the ‘good anti nausea’ pill your talking about called Ondansetron (spelling??)!? That is top notch and highly expensive a pop! After each of my Chemo rounds I was given three of these tablets and told to take them when it was really bad! However, my GP was great with anti nausea and gave me a whole lot to have on hand, so if one didn’t cut it, another might have! (sometimes GPs, like mine, are way better at sorting this stuff out for you, and are not stingy with dishing out the ‘goods’
Just an idea if your not getting much help or a few different options with anti nausea pills from your Oncologist!)!!!
I hope you get a decent rest tonight, I fear I need to resign myself to the fact that I will never have my great deep sleeps ever again…… just add it to the continually growing list of cancer treatments side effects!!
Don’t forget the Lavender Spray tonight – it’s definately helped me!!
Night,
Sarah xox