3 Too Many

Tuesday 28 August Ramble

“Strength does not come from physical capacity. It comes from an indomitable will.” – Mahatma Gandhi

Restless sleep again, but at least managed to sleep through.  Woke though at 6am so head down to the gym for a spell.  Got to try to keep this fitness thing going as it seems to be working well as not quite as fatigued and feeling better both physically and mentally.  Also seem to be sleeping better too, although I am now on a very low dose of steroids so that will also be helping hugely.  Manage to do 25mins in gym and 20mins on spin bike.  Feel great for it, though I now have a sore head and feel really ill :-(  Cuppa tea doesn’t even go down well, so is tipped out.  Still suck it up and get ready for work. 

Good day at work.  Head to the Ingram Micro Showcase  – IT resellers & vendors touting theirs wears.  Interesting seeing some of the cool new stuff that’s going to be released soon.  Also have a laugh at how Apple is suing Samsung yet if you go into Yoobee or even at the Showcase – the Apple displays all have Samsung TV’s displaying the Apple promotions.  Ironic really.  Get back to work just in time for my ride home. 

Have the interment of Daisy and Eric Adam’s ashes this afternoon so stop by the Party Warehouse to pick up some helium balloons, to release after the little service.  Go then to pick up Lachlan then Jacob.  Head out then to the Yaldhurst Cemetery.  We have a lovely small service there and release the balloons.  I get the shakes (especially on the random left) as I’m placing a flower on the ashes and nearly end up falling into the hole.  That would not have been a good look at all!!  Go to Pam’s then for a cuppa tea – though still not stomaching anything, and head is hurting quite a bit.

Head off then for home and dinner.  Sue heads out to meet Janita for a coffee and a catch up.  I round the boys up and send them to bed – only cause its bed time – actually they take themselves off to bed – good lads. 

Watch some rubbish tv and do some more research about the tumours – though the reading is all fairly much the same.  Due to their rarity, the amount of new or recent info is minimal, and unfortunately they are all bad reading.  But it makes me determined to be a long survivor of them.  I also really have taken the odds to new levels, as most people only have one tumour of this type.  I’ve managed to produce three – and are only one of approx 50 people in the world this year to get these.  It is not always good to be unique as it means it can make it a little to hard to treat.  Oh and to make it worse, the big mofo has grown deep in between two lobes, therefore making it inoperable – well unless I want to risk been paralysed and brain-damaged.  Not even worth considering.  And no, I’m not going to tell you exactly what the tumour type is as I don’t want you to get a shock or worry about what the prognosis is.  All you need to know is that I am doing well with treatment, feeling good in my head, and myself, and are hitting this battle head on.  The mental coping needed is actually more draining than anything, so to have moved to a new phase of dealing with it and accepting that this is the way it will be for the next 6-7 months and I can and will do it and I will learn to plan around the bad days and enjoy and live the good days.  Yes – I am applying my stubborn side to getting through this.  I will not be beaten by the mofo’s – “I will define this cancer, not this cancer define me.”

I do the dishes then get on with the blog.  M&D time as needing more strong pain killers – head and body just aching today along with the nausea.  My first meal of the day was dinner and that was an effort too.  Ironically my stomach hurts from getting food in it.  Bloody hell – really!  Hope all have had a nice day/arvo/evening. 

 Kia Kaha.

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