3 Too Many

1 Day till Chemo starts again.

Odd start to the day.  Wake suddenly at 4:20 then at 4:21 the cell phones all light up for no reason – as in no emails, text, alarms, or the likes – just glows. Hhmm – something in the Force changed young Jedi.  I know I had been getting cramp and head pain in the night but nothing to cause a sudden awakening like that as feel ok. Lay there staring at the ceiling thinking and wondering about things.  Maybe I have just flipped back into Chemo mode a day early – as in having to get up early to get the drugs on board?  Try to go back to sleep but no luck so up at 5.  Will do some work for a bit then on to the spin bike for a session – 5km today – wearing down as the week goes on, but done 3 days now – so habit formed again!  Feeling better each day too.  Listen to the noises of a city starting to wake – kind of cool – love early mornings. 

Maybe my take on normality is skewed at the moment in that I am desperate to continue to rid myself of these fuzzy ‘in case’ drugs that I am falsely believing that I can put the past 4 1/2 months behind me like some bad dream and start again.  Not sure, but I know that even within a week I am improving more each day.  But with tomorrow bringing the next round of the battle who knows what the new normality will become.  All I know is that whatever it does produce, I will be ready for it.  I will not let these 3 mofo’s win.  As I have said they will adjust to me and so far this week they have been playing ball with that idea. As a note for those I have not seen, there is a marked change in even the symptoms that I presented with when this was all diagnosed.  I had droopy on the left side of my face (similar to Bells Palsy), along with slight paralysis, slurred speech, tingling & lack of strength in left arm & hand.  Now my face has come mostly right, speech slurs slightly when tired but better all round, arm & hand (aka Wilson) all but gone.  But then as I remind myself that dwelling on the point life changed maybe a good thing in a way (as it is a real connection to so much),  I need to also remember that when I finish the treatment early next year I will have a whole new normality.  I’m not sure what state mentally or physically I’ll be in then but I am going to start making a mental list of what I intend to be able to do or be doing in 6-7 months time.

Get ready for work and Jacob appears looking like death warmed up with hair standing on end and eyes red and sore.  Poor lad has not voice either.  Make sure he stays arms length – last thing I need is another lurgy.  Give him a strepsil for his throat and he zones out in front to tv then goes to see Mum.  Sue is going to stay home with him so I head to work with Jono.  Sue then has to head to work so packs Jacob up as well.  Have a good day and hang in there until 2:15.  Jacob wants to have a look from the offices at the city so take him to the 7th floor for a look, and then to the 5th floor so he can see my desk and say Hi to my PortaCarers.

Head home to rest then as heading out for dinner tonight and head is hurting and I’m tiring.  Have some drugs and put my feet up for a bit.  Then head out for a walk to clear my head and stretch the legs.  Work on the blog seen as not sure how late tonight will be and as it was an early start and tomorrow will be an early one with Chemo starting again.

Head out for dinner.  Drop Jacob at Roh & Andy’s & the girls – thanks guys.  Then off to Edesia in Show Place.  We meet Jenny, Jamie, Karl and the birthday lady Pam there.  Awesome dinner – have Beef fillet carpaccio for an entrée, then Angus Prime Eye Fillet with roasted root vegetables, Boxty potato, smoked bacon lardons, baby onions, & red wine jus for the main.  And a lovely birthday cake for dessert.  I lovely night great food and wonderful company. 

Head off then to collect Jacob and head home.  Finish blog and do M&D (Milo & Drugs) time then bed.  Hope all have had a good day/arvo/evening too. 

Kia Kaha.