Monday30 April Ramble
April 30, 2012 — HeadlessTime minus 7 days till the head on war with these unwanted guests starts with a full on barrage of Radiation and Chemo together – bring it on.
Well today folks started for 2 how at 3am – with the large tumor getting deep and uncomfortable and deciding to wake me for a midnight snack of painkillers. I give into its request – begrudgingly feed it but more probably cause my right hand /wrist is throbbing like bastard! Seems footy injury was maybe a little more than I thought. Decide to listen to what the big tumor (ok people – time to name these guys as I’m sick of the word tumor – give me some ideas of names – remember there is 1 x 3cm and 2 cuzzies 1.2cm nearby – actually just thought they could be the bros – as in “tat tu bro – no that 2 bro no that 3 bro” – oh well I tried! ) is processing. Today we are deep and meaningful on people – you folk out there reading this and how you feel about what i going on with these things. In the course of a day i meet lots of people – most know what’s happening so all cool. Some have heard a bit of what’s happening – come folks blog up! And others just don’t /can’t talk to me about what’s happening. It is interesting from my perspective – in that you can tell those that want to know all the facts (sorry folks – things like exact life expectancy is in hands beyond those of this world – docs are not gamblers usually and the odds when the end number no matter the maths is 0 – is well 0) so it is down to me you see how much mongrel I can put into the fight that will determine my time. But I am very much here and now and will be blogging this for a while to come – so bookmark i now if you haven’t this is going to be like a war & peace novel if i have my way. Sorry back to people – yep there are those that want to know what’s going on but when then you tell them yo can see them processing it going – yep I know what you’re saying but I don’t like it so I’m going to selectively choose what I want to take in, then there is the head in the sand folk who then go so if operate – hang on I just said can’t operate – instant paralysis, possible death (well we don’t want to really push our luck when you’re already walking the ragged cliff of life at 50 in 7.2 billion per yea odds that a doc isn’t going to have a twitchy finger that day!) Plus no surgeon will even look at the case. Back to story again – I just said can’t operate, just Chemo & Radiation – so they are going to tun me into Toxic Tony! I’ll be able to heat meals with my radioactive head from 50 metres – poison cockroaches with my breath. Some people go, so if they do nothing, then what will happen – ah – hello – spot whose got growth space in their grey matter 
– What I am trying to get at through all this waffle is if you see me a want to talk – then please talk. I am well known as a talker apparently – shoosh in the cheap seats!! I am emotionally calm, happy to share anything I have learnt on this journey, including symptoms that we have now matched up to what was happening earlier on. Any advice I could give to others whom may have someone who has cancer too and is finding it hard to deal with. If you need or want to cry on my shoulder then do as i helps both of us. While this will end with me one day – it will, live with all of you one day.
Right that’s enough of the deep stuff – watch out for more as it’s lurking in “tat’3 bro!” Up again at 6:20 ish – into gym for a session – bloody hurting already – but bugger it! Rush, rush as time has slowed again – maybe i need to start actually taking the extra hours when i get up at 5m to get ready. Jono picks up Jacob & I and off to school & work we go.
Aaron – IT Boss from Wellington is down, great to see you Aaron – off to the cafe for a Coffee and a catchup. Good to explain things face to face. It is also a game changer for your career btw! Back into some work – oh and some eating – I try o resist – but it is futile the grip of the steroid stomach starts its wave of destruction across the food I’ve brought in for lunch! dammit!!! Then Cath reminds me that it is portacot KFC day (we had decided to have KFC one day last week). Aaron is in on the idea too – so drive us to get it and best of all – pays – yay!!!
Off the to th red zone to check out where the desk will be on the 5th floor. Also we show Aaron around. Get dropped outside the Art Gallery and about to summon my ride but decide that – it is warm, I feel like waking and I’m in pain from head to toe (including the right hand that is swollen badly for some reason so I’ll walk home – its only about 5.5km’s. I don’t know how many times I nearly made the call for rescuing – but managed to push through the pain – yay can still do it if need be. Sorry a little psychological test there.
Get home 50 mins later – Feel completely stuffed, in pain but good otherwise. Cook wraps for tea. Everyone is looking as stuffed as I much as I am. Early night for all – except old blog central here whose random 2 finger typing is very slow 
So there we have the day in a doggy bag or is that a bloggy bag- haha – you crack me up tat 2 bro – nope tat1 bo 
Kia Kaha
May 1, 2012 at 9:58 pm
Hi Tony, Thank you sooo much for sharing your blog with us! I log in every night and read what you are up to and how you are going. I was talking to Sue last Friday and had a good chat with her, which was very long overdue!!! Oliver and Lachlan caught up with each other on Saturday morning on the football field at Cuthberts Green. You will laugh at this……….Lachlan and Oliver were playing the same position, so they were marking each other. Lachlan was saying to Oliver about how much he thought the Coastal team had improved and he asked Oliver if there was still an Oliver in the team…….Oliver said, that is ME! Think they had bit of a chuckle about that!!!!
Mark and I certainly laughed!!
Tony, our thoughts are with you, Sue, Jacob and Lachlan constantly, and we are sending strong vibes your way as you are about to start treatment!!!!
May 2, 2012 at 10:31 am
Hey there Mark/Kylie,
Sue said that the boys had a knatter on the pitch about knowing each other then going doh – it’s you – how funny! Glad you’re enjoying the blog. I try to keep it light hearted and not to deeep most of the time but there will be the bits that need to escape – if that makes sense. We must arrange to catch up sometime as been far too long really. Good win by Olivers team though – well done and well deserved.
Thanks for the thoughts and vibes – all greatfully accepted – as everything helps in everyway.
Take care of yourselves too. Hope is all good over in your neck of the hood quakes are not messing to much with life. Thankfully we don’t get the smaller ones notw that you get, but we were when they were from Greendale & Port Hills. Mind you I don’t actually mind quakes as the physics of what’s happening out weighs
things – but that’s me out of left field and I nknow 99% of Cantabs would hate me thinking like that. SUe nd boys all good here.
Cheers, Tony.
May 2, 2012 at 10:20 pm
Hey Tony, just thought of some names for those threes unwanted guests……….thinking Austin Powers………Fat Bastard and Fookyou! Fookme (not so sure bout the last one, but you will probably laugh anyway).
May 3, 2012 at 10:49 pm
HAhaha – love the theme – just shagga dellic baby!
May 1, 2012 at 6:52 pm
where did my comment go ??!!
May 2, 2012 at 10:22 am
Settle Jen – we have to approve the comment before you’ll see it again
– Approved!
May 2, 2012 at 11:20 am
Yes I am ,rather impatient Mr Edmonds
May 2, 2012 at 9:26 pm
No comment Jen
May 1, 2012 at 5:34 pm
Hey Tony,
I can hear you saying every word and the hand gestures that would go with it.
How could we not follow this fabulous blog you have created. You have made it into our Favourites!!! That way when I check it each day it is easier to find. I have laughed until I have almost cried. I have cried, and then five lines later you make me laugh again
As for naming your tumors, I think bastard 1, 2, & 3 sounds pretty bloody good!!!
Love you guys heaps ( I will deliver more baking next week) we are only a phone call away.
Yours,
A daily reader ( Amy )
May 2, 2012 at 9:36 pm
Yay – I’m on the hit list – at least somewhere else but the hospital
Teasing folks – I hve heard lots of people are following what’s happening – thanks all. Glad the mixed up writing style is working. Yep and usually the hand gestures are freely swining as i type- though I have control of Wilson now so can’t blame him completely anymore!
Names – glad you took the toned version for them as I have often referred to them with stronger terms – but they could be Rangis Basstad 1; Fetu Basstad 2 & Hemi Baastad or”Tat Tu Basstad Bros?” T2b2’S for short – Nah doesn’t really ork does it?
Thanks you so much for the baking too – sorry how rude I missed mentionin git on the BlLog – humble appologies – the droids are enjoyin working their way through it all, along with the rest of the family
We must arrange an F&C time catch up too.
Take care
May 1, 2012 at 10:38 am
Great blog today!!
On names!! …The 3 stooges , Moe, Larry & Curly
xx
May 1, 2012 at 11:10 pm
Thanks Jen – will have a think on them. THe other suggestion is Rangis, Fetu, and Hemi.
May 1, 2012 at 7:54 am
You have given us a day’s thinking Tony
May 1, 2012 at 11:07 pm
Thanks Pam – I have had several people comment on the blog from Monday so must hav go peopl ethink ing – yay!
May 1, 2012 at 6:59 am
Hey Tony! Just to let you know I am following your blogs daily! Sorry I havent sent you a note for a while! I guess I have lots of questions but have avoided asking. Things like, can you be around the family when you are having radiation? How are the boys and Sue? I wanted to say something to Lachie when he was down and give him a big hug, but then also just wanted him to goof round with Caleb and be a kid, and have a few days without worrying about you. Though am sure they do plenty of that in private. you are doing so well with your writing, illustrating your feelings and doings so fully! By the way, have you got the shitty weather up your way yet? It arrived here on Sunday. Brr…winter is suddenly here with an almight start! Hugs to you all!!!
May 1, 2012 at 11:06 pm
Hey Toni,
Good to hera you’r reading it – still, it can get a bit waffley. Fire away with the questions – yep I get to be around everyone still as the Radiation is X-Rays – 15 minute doses aimed at my right brain 5 days a week for 6 weeks so about 450 minutes worth of x-rays been shot into me – if I don’t get good reception of cook tea on my head by then I don’t know what it’ll take! The Chemo drugs are the hings that will probably knock me around the most – but mainly vomitting! Sue and boys are all really good – it has been a huge emotional week for all as her 102 Nana passed away and her funeral was on Saturday morning. Lchie would hve loved a hugf- apparently he is into the chat and huug mode. The boys are very resiliant and are doing so very well with it all they make us so proud. Just spill my guts out on the keyboard – no point tamingn it down as it is not who I am then – so glad you enjoy reading it.
Yep the cold has embraced Canterbuury – bloody winters here – though we didn’t get it as bad as you.
Hugs to all there – keep warm. Anymore questions – ask away.